Give, Give, Give

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Everyone knows the old sayings about marriage and how everything requires compromise and each partner should give 50%.  Well- they are wrong!  Everything should not require compromise or everything will end up turning into a business negotiation and someone will feel that they gave up more than they should have.  This leads to resentment and it doesn’t have to.  While there are certain situations that may be important enough to you or your spouse to make an issue of that will require compromise, it’s time to consider making sacrifices here and there for your spouse.  He or she will, of course, be surprised when you do so, but they will also begin doing the same for you out of appreciation for you and your actions.

Each partner in a marriage should not be giving 50% all of the time.  If you are only giving 50%, you are only doing have as well as you could be doing.  If you and your spouse are both giving 100%, you can’t go wrong.  You are both giving your marriage all of your dedication and effort.  If you and your spouse are planning on only meeting each other halfway, you will only be successful half of the time (or maybe even less).

Romance isn’t really romance when it’s convenient for you or your spouse.  Your romantic gestures on romantic days like Valentine’s Day or birthdays can only be considered romantic if you go out of your way to be romantic throughout the rest of the year.  You don’t have to spend money in order to be romantic, either.  Begin offering to stop on the way home in case he or she would like you to pick something up.  Never allow anyone else to greet him or her at the airport no matter what time the flight arrives.  Start getting up and taking care of housework or even the kids before he or she has the chance to ask you to.

Instead of thinking about being romantic, simply do it.  Make the decision that you are going to fall in love with your spouse and simply do it.  If you spend too much time thinking about it, you will find yourself the victim of self-sabotage.  You will focus on faults, hurts and other unimportant distractions that will stop you from reaching your goal.  You don’t need books or a professional to help you with this process.  You simply make the decision and you will DO it.

In order to become more romantic by just doing it, you will find that listening is your best tool.  By listening to him or her with more that just your ears but with your eyes and heart as well, you will see that there is so much more to discover about the incredible person you are committed to.  Not only will you find that they are offering all sorts of clue and tips on how to be more romantic in your relationship, you will also find opportunities to offer support and fall in love all over again.

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